The Naming

So, the new car’s name is….drumroll, please…Gretel.

Since everyone is probably scratching their heads, let me explain. I name inanimate objects based on what they remind me of. For example, my laptop’s name is Margaret because Margaret seems like such a smart, studious name. Gretel reminded me of an organized, efficient, Swiss nanny…until I researched the name and found out that Gretel has German origins. So, now the name Gretel evokes images of an organized, efficient, German nanny. I think my car is a little like that. It’s compact and doesn’t call too much attention to itself. I didn’t go for the shiny blue or red, just a nice basic, enduring black (though it does have a fun glittery finish). But, even the glitter is supposed to repel the sun, so it has a purpose. I can answer my phone from the steering wheel of the car, and it barely has any pockets (which is making me crazy, but which speaks to its efficient, clutterless nature). It monitors tire pressure, how many miles I can go until I run out of gas, and what gas mileage I’m getting. In other words, the car is probably more organized than I’ll ever be.

But, Gretel also speaks of bravery, cunning and a little bit of a free spirit. After all, Gretel starred in that famous fairy tale. Sure, it might have been a little stupid to leave only a trail of breadcrumbs as a preventative measure against complete and utter failure to emerge alive from a wild forest (but, it was a story in the land before GPS systems, so I like to think of her and Hansel as innovators who used the materials they had on hand. Sometimes plans just doesn’t turn out the way we think they will.) And, when Gretel did get in trouble, you’ve got to give her credit. She figured out how to outsmart a witch and make her escape.

And, finally, I chose Gretel because you’ve got to be careful when you use human names for inanimate objects. It’s awkward if you meet someone and have to say, “Oh, I’ll remember you. You share a name with my….uh…car.” Life is full of surprises, but I doubt I’ll meet a Gretel anytime soon, and I doubt I’ll move to Germany either. Plus, if I did move to Germany, I wouldn’t take Gretel with me. The steering wheel is on the wrong side, and let’s face it, if I ever get unleashed on the Autobahn, I don’t want to be in a Ford Fiesta. No offense Gretel.

3 thoughts on “The Naming

  1. ha! My car’s name is Coco (my last car was Daisy). My GPS is Gigi. And I have a room in my house (the screened-in porch where we have lots of family dinners) called Irene. Naming things is a time-honored tradition. Welcome, Gretel! xoxo

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